Will Queen Elizabeth give Kate Middleton the boot for showing booty?－fashion latest

Remember that striped shirt and skin-tight leggings Kate wore when she spotted the evil paparazzi and suddenly started spontaneously playing volley ball a few months ago?

They’re...back!

And so is Kate’s hiney!

All in the news!

Yup!

Over the weekend, Kate Middleton showed us all her hiney once again.

This time, there were no helicopters, no wind, and her dress did not fly up around her waist, showing us her naked hiney.

Nope!

This time, Kate’s pants slid down and her top slid up, and we again saw her hiney.

Well, not her whole hiney this time.

Just where the crack of it begins.

View photos: Semi-Formal Dresses

Yup!

Helloo there, Your Royal Hineyness!

Maybe it was done to tease Prince William, who was riding his horse around, playing polo. Maybe Kate, who brought Baby Prince George along, showed us her hiney in honor of Father’s Day! Or maybe it was just because she’s psychologically addicted to bearing her behind, and the past two weeks of going “cold turkey” in the booty department was just too much to bare.

I mean, bear.

Kate’s pink coat in Scotland clearly had something sewn in to its hem that stuck out in the front and looked like a dress weight, like my mother used to sew into her drapery hems, designed to keep Kate’s clothing from flapping up around in the breeze and over her waist, showing us all her naked derriere.

Yup.

See the little creased places where something’s bulging within the hemline?

It’s likely a dress weight.

It’s worn to keep a skirt of light fabric from flapping around in the wind, and whooshing up over the wearer’s waist.

When Kate and William crossed the English Channel to France for the D-Day celebrations, they did not join the Queen, Prince Philip, Prince Charles and Camilla on the dais or in the Bayeux Cathederal, but hosted a tea party far, far down the road with some veterans, one of whom thought nothing of going up to Kate and giving her a smootchy, 80-something smack on the mouth! Or was it her cheek?

Eeeuuuw!

But that’s the kind of thing you get when you make a habit of showing your naked hiney to the world.

Nobody would dare kiss Her Majesty like that!

And Camilla, well...we know that Charles is happy kissing her, and that seems good enough to keep our roiling imaginations quiet for now.

While pouring tea into horny World War II veterans, Kate was well-bundled up, and wore avery long, heavy-looking blue dress that noticeably stayed perfectly in place, did not rise up in any breezes, and did not reveal to us her naked hiney.

Then, for some kind of special occasion where Kate did a lot of pointing and lecturing and sticking her spidery fingers on America’s Cup, she wore a long white dress that covered her hiney and tapered down to slightly below her knees, so it didn’t blow up and we didn’t see anything. Because the America’s Cup event had a passel of fawning men surrounding Kate, rather than the usual gang of brainless adoring women, we were bracing ourselves for seeing Kate’s naked hiney at any moment.

But then nothing happened, and so we assumed that the Royal Family had finally decided to take matters into hand and tell the 32-soon-to-be-33 woman representing the Crown that she’d better start covering her naked hiney or at least wear some underpants (as she has in the past), or else she’ll get the royal boot.